


The Hannah Method

by violetchachkii



Category: Grey's Anatomy
Genre: Gen, Izzie's Daughter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-05-21
Updated: 2011-05-21
Packaged: 2017-11-25 18:46:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,539
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/641871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/violetchachkii/pseuds/violetchachkii
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"People are like stained - glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within." -Elisabeth Kubler-Ross. Written May 21st, 2011.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Hannah Method

Alex Karev couldn't keep a smile from crossing his lips as the last of the African kids he had helped were leaving the hospital. It was all his; he had made this happen. He was a shoo in for Chief Resident now. All the others could take that.

He grinned cockily and walked to the circulation desk to wait to see if there was a case he would be put on now that he had completed his task with the children. He leaned against the desk, still in his haze of self-righteousness.

Down the hall, the chief walked with purpose. There were so many surgeries and studies going on at the hospital and then Adele getting worse and worse, he had forgotten that he had offered Seattle Grace/Mercy West to teach a CPR and First Aid course for teenagers. He was slightly panicked, until he saw Karev standing by the desk, looking unstressed. He picked up his pace and approached the doctor.

"Karev," he said in his head-like voice. Alex's ears perked up at the sound of the chief's called. He was ready for the congratulations about his success with the kids. He stood straight up.

"Yes, Chief," he said. Dr. Weber sighed and put a hand on Alex's shoulder.

"I need you're help today. I have a group of high schoolers coming in who are expecting to get the best CPR and First Aid training in Washington. I know it's not exactly your specialty, but I think you can manage."

Alex's face fell. He had just saved dying children from third-world countries and now he was going to have to teach CPR to a bunch of high school students. All the other residents were out doing surgeries that could save lives and he was being put on brat patrol.

"But…" he started, but knew arguing would be futile. He had to do what the chief told him to do; it was that simple. He sighed, "Where are they?"

Richard smiled thankfully and patted Alex's shoulder firmly, "There's a group of about 20 of them in the waiting room. Thanks Karev," he said and started to walk away. He stopped and turned around, "Oh, and good job with the whole African kids thing…"

Alex nodded unenthusiastically, ready to get this over. This was his thanks for doing all that work. But at least he was in the Chief's good graces. That may make the choice for Chief Resident a little easier for him. He grinned and headed down the hall to the waiting room.

*

Alex walked into the waiting room and was met by a crowd of teenagers looking eager to get out of the room. Just from a glance over, most looked like either tools that were just doing this so they could be a lifeguard over the summer and the others were girls who wanted to make a quick buck babysitting. He sighed and walked to the front desk. The receptionist handed him a clipboard that had which room the demonstration would take place in and a list of names. He breathed out heavily and turned to face the group.

"Everyone here for the CPR demonstration follow me," he said simply. He waited a second while they all moved around to get up. He walked through the doors back into the halls of the hospital, with the crowd of teens following him closely. He led them to one of the lecture rooms that were used when they needed to make a large announcement to all the doctors. On the table sat a CPR dummy all ready for the lesson. Alex rolled his eyes and gestured for them all to sit in the rows of chairs, which they obliged to. He stood at the front of the room in front of the dummy, scanning over the crowd.

He could resist asking, "Okay, before we start, I just want a show of hands, how many of you are because you want to be all cool and be a lifeguard for a summer job?" he waited while about a half of the group's hands rose. He smirked, "Put 'em down. How many because you want to earn a quick buck babysitting?" the other half went up; except for one. He looked at the girl in the corner of the room whose hand didn't go up. "And any who are doing this because they want to be a serious medical professional?" the girl's hand went up in the air slowly. He smiled slightly, but went back to business.

He gave them the full demonstration on how exactly to do all the techniques and proper precautions. He called some of them up to give it a try, but most were either hesitant or didn't know what they were doing. He remembered to keep his patience with much effort. Finally the demonstration was over and he was leading them back into the lobby. The kids fanned out, some huddling in groups, most leaving the hospital and going to their cars outside. He was about to turn to go back through the double doors where he had just come from when a tap on his shoulder stopped him. He turned to see the one girl who had raised her hand when he asked if any of them wanted to be a serious medical professional. She was short with large brown eyes and thin yet long blond hair hanging passed her shoulders. She clutched a stickered notebook to her chest tight, smiling largely.

"Hi, um I'm Hannah," she said slightly awkward, "I thought your demonstration was very…informative. With the side sarcasm that came with it that the other's didn't understand, it was very enjoyable."

Alex raised his eyebrows and nodded slowly. She looked familiar, like someone he knew was in her, "Thanks kid, glad I could help," he turned to walk away, but she stopped him again by speaking up.

"I wanted to ask you something," she said, stepping beside him. He looked at her expectantly. She nodded, looking down at her notebook for a second, having not thought she would get this far. She looked back up and rubbed her lips together before speaking, "Do you know Isobel Stevens?"

His heart dropped upon hearing that name. He had spent enormous amounts of his time trying to get over Izzie and know this kid was bringing her back up again. He sighed, knowing he had to give her an answer, "Yeah, I know her."

"Good," Hannah said happily, but still slightly mystified that he was still talking to her, "Does she still work here?"

He swallowed the lump in his throat and shook his head, "I'm sorry, she doesn't anymore."

Her face fell slightly, but she put on a fake smile, "Oh, well then, thank you anyway Doctor…Karev," she turned to walk away, but it was his turn to stop her.

"Wait," he said walking towards her. She turned around, a glimmer of hope in her eyes, "why do you want Izzie?"

She looked down at her feet for a second and then back up, "Well…I'm her daughter."

Alex shook his head, trying to wrap his mind around what she had said, "Wait, what?"

*

He knew it was completely inappropriate to be sitting outside of the downtown Bistro with a teenaged girl, but Alex needed to know what this was all about. Was he being messed with? Did Izzie send this girl to mess with his head?

He looked across the small metal table at the blond as she sipped the coffee he'd bought her thoughtfully. He had to admit; she looked a lot like Izzie, with the same hair, the same eyes. She looked up from her coffee and smiled at him, making him think even more of his ex-wife.

"So…can you please explain this all to me?" he asked her, still unbelieving. She nodded and sat up straighter.

"Well, Isobel...or Izzie as you call her, had me when she was 16 years old and gave me up for adoption. My parents were very clear about that since I was very young. But then when I was 10 I was diagnosed with leukemia, so my parents took me to Seattle Grace after a year so we could find Izzie who would be a good bone marrow donor, since she was my mother. They asked if I wanted to meet her then, but I declined. I mean, I didn't want to put myself through that then when I was already so afraid. Anyway, the marrow did help and with that and chemo, I've been in remission for three years now. I just wanted to find her so I could finally thank her and tell her that I wanted to be a doctor, just like her."

Alex listened to every word of the girl's story. She sounded so sincere and he knew she was telling the truth; he could just tell. What he wanted to know was why Izzie never told him about all this. She was his wife, even if it was short lived. Weren't they supposed to be completely honest with each other? Why would she hide this from him?

Hannah spoke up again, "I know it's hard to take in, but it's the truth. So, I was just wondering if you knew where she is."

He shook his head sadly, "I don't. She just…left and we really don't know where she went. It was after our divorce was final…"

"Wait," she looked at him with so much glee, "You too were married?"

He nodded with dismay, "For a short time. She had cancer too, a brain tumor. But after it was gone, we had a fallout and she just packed up and left. We haven't seen her since."

"Oh," she took a sip of her coffee, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bring up any bad feelings, I was just curious."

"It's cool. No harm done," he said and looked down at the table, trying to think of a new topic of conversation, "So…you wanna be a doctor? What are you, only…15, how do you know it's what you want to do?"

"I'm almost 16 and yeah, I'm sure it's what I want to do. I mean, when I was in the hospital, I spent so much time reading and working on work, I easily skipped two grades. I might be a blond, but I'm really smart. And when I graduate at the end of the year, I'm going to university and then med school. I know what I want do, and I'm going to do it."

Alex nodded, seeing more and more of Izzie as she spoke. It was like looking at the spitting image of her, not only in the looks department, but also brains and determination. Hannah finished off her coffee and smiled across the table.

"You're a doctor, right?" she asked rhetorically. She opened her notebook after grabbing it off the ground where it was next to her feet. She flipped through a bunch of pages until she reached one that had a ton of writing and diagrams on it. "I've been researching Seattle Grace/Mercy West and I was looking up the clinical study…the Shepard method. I've been looking into it and when I become a doctor, I want to see if it will work on other tumors…like ones in other parts of the body," she angled the book so Alex could read it, "I mean, there's so much that could be done with it. They could save people with…pancreatic cancer. I mean, they say it's basically incurable, but with further research they could save millions of lives."

Alex looked over the writing in the book. It looked like she had put a lot of thought into this and he could see where she was coming from. But it could be dangerous and she was only a 15-year-old kid; he didn't want to put too much investment into it, "Whoa, kid, it's not that easy. These things cost money and time and they take a lot of trials and a lot of people."

"First, I don't like being called 'kid'," she said, irritated, "And I know it's risky, but in 10 years or so, it may be possible. I'm not saying to go out an invest into my idea, but I just wanted to see if you thought it was a good idea."

He nodded and looked over her notes, "Listen, Hannah. I think you're getting way ahead of yourself. You need to wait a little bit and maybe when you're a doctor, you can figure this out. But you're going to have to wait and see."

She nodded, "I know. I guess having first hand knowledge of what it's like going through a life threatening disease gives you some blissful ignorance. But, thank you for listening to my rambling and such. Not many people give me the time of day."

"I don't see why not," he said, trying to be reassuring, "You're a pretty cool kid."

"Thank you," she stood up, clutching her notebook close again, "I should get going. But…I was wondering if I could ever see you again. You're the closest thing I have to my real mom and I was thinking it might be cool if you and I could…talk and stuff."

Alex sighed and fumbled with his cup, "I don't know…it doesn't sound like a good idea. I mean, me hanging out with a 15 year old, it's a little suspicious."

Hannah frowned, "But you could be like my mentor or something. I trust you and you know so much I want to know. Please…I just want to talk to you sometime. It doesn't even need to be about my mom or anything. It could be purely medical talk. You, a practicing surgeon, teaching me, a young and eager student, the ropes and trials of living in the medical world. It's simply professional."

He knew he'd regret this later, but gave in. "Fine. We can meet here like once a week and can talk, okay?"

She nodded enthusiastically, "Yay!" she squealed, sounding just like Izzie, "Thank you so much Doctor Karev!"

"You can call me Alex," he said, not wanting the formalities with her.

"Okay…Alex," she ripped a piece of paper out of her notebook and pulled a pen out of her jean pocked. She scribbled something down before shoving the paper at him. He grabbed it and looked down at it. "It's my number, just in case. Can you meet here at…5:30 next Wednesday? That's when I get out of my extra collage courses."

"Yeah," he told her, still thinking this was a bad idea. But the grin on her face was too much to say no to. It wasn't like anything bad was happening. He was just her mentor after all.

"Thank you so, so much Alex. You won't regret it," she said before waving slightly and hurrying off. He shook his head and smirked, drinking down the rest of his coffee.

*

Alex couldn't keep Hannah out of his mind for the rest of the day. She was so much like Izzie it hurt him. She had the same intelligent eagerness that no doubt had gotten the teen in trouble before. He was still on the fence about the whole mentor thing, but he thought that she had potential and helping her might get her head straight to what was achievable and what wasn't. But what would people think about him spending so much time with a young girl? People talked around the hospital and if any one saw him with her at the Bistro would certainly spread the word that he was doing something with a child. It was definitely a risk, but he couldn't have stopped himself from saying yes if he tried.

He sighed and shut his locker at the end of the day what seemed to be very loudly. All the other people in the room looked at him curiously, but then returned to their business. The only one who questioned him was Meredith, who was only a couple lockers away from him.

"Alex, what's with the slamming?" She asked as she gathered her hair in a ponytail and let it fall behind her back. He let out an extended breath. He could trust Meredith, out of everyone in the room.

"I met Izzie's kid today," he said simply. She raised an eyebrow.

"Wait, you met her?"

He slumped down on the bench beside the locker and Meredith followed in suit. "She was in that stupid CPR class I had to teach this morning. And now she wants me to be her mentor or something."

Meredith bit her lip in thought before speaking, "Don't you think that's a bit of a risk? If someone assumes the worst you could lose you're career over this."

"I know, I know, but she's so much like Izzie. It's too hard to say no to her. I mean, this girl is smart too. She wants to be a doctor and everything. She read the entire Shepard Method and has all these ideas about how it could create so many advances in medicine. It's insane."

"Do you think they're accurate?" she asked, curiously.

"She's only a 15 year old kid, I don't know how much thought she's put into it. But she is no stranger to hospitals and medicine. She's in remission for leukemia…"

"I know," Meredith said, "Izzie donated marrow to her when she was 11."

"It's crazy, isn't it?" he said, standing, "I just want to know why Izzie didn't tell me. She didn't even tell me she had a kid," he stopped and thought, "Wait, how did you know?"

"I had to help Bailey with the testing. I sort of put two and two together. But I didn't think she wanted anyone else to know, so I didn't tell you."

He nodded sadly, "I get it. But I just wish I had known so I wouldn't have the initial shock. And now I've agreed to see her once a week for a while. How am I going to get through that?"

Meredith stood up and looked up at him, "It's gonna be okay. At least you're doing something good, right? Just…be careful, okay."

He nodded and she gave a small smile before retreating from the locker room.

*

Alex stayed true to his word and on Wednesday was able to escape from the hospital to go see Hannah. He agreed internally that he would talk to her for one day and then tell her he couldn't do it anymore. She would understand and at least she'd get to talk to him.

When he got to the small shop, he saw a tumbleweed of golden hair and knew it was Hannah. He approached the table. As soon as he came into view, a gigantic smile spread across her features and she closed the notebook that was open in front of her. He gave a faint grin in return and sat across from her at the table.

"I can't believe you came," she said happily, "Thanks again Alex, so much."

He shrugged liked it was nothing, even though it was definitely something. He looked over his shoulder quick before turning back to face her. "So…" he began, trying to start conversation, "You said you're taking some collage courses."

"Oh yes," she nodded quickly, "I'm taking a biology course since AP Biology II is the most advance class my school has. It's stupendous, really. I'm learning things I never imagined were even real. My oncologist says I'm too dedicated to it and that I should be a biologist instead of a doctor," she stopped herself, "I'm rambling, aren't I?"

He shook his head, "No, it's interesting. You are so much like your mom," he let it slip out before thinking.

"Oh," she said, looking down and tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to bring it up. It's just that you have the same optimism and dedication she has. It feels like I'm talking to Izzie sometimes."

She smiled and ran her fingers over the stickers on her notebook. Alex watched her carefully. Her silence was slightly alarming, but he took it as her trying to process what he had said. When she looked back up at him, he couldn't hold back a grin.

"Can I ask you something?" she said quietly.

"Yeah, anything," he said, though he hoped she didn't take that too literally.

"Do you still love Izzie?"

He sighed and leaned back in his chair, trying to think of how he did feel and how to word exactly how he felt as delicately as possible. Thinking about Izzie was something he tried not to do much; it hurt too much. But he didn't want to leave her daughter without an explanation.

"I'll always love her. But there comes a point when I have to accept that she's not coming back and that I need to move on. Of course it's going to hurt whenever I think of her and it sucks, but I get over it. It's not worth dwelling on forever."

"That makes sense," she said, still quietly, "I really wish I would've met her. I regret it so much that I turned it down when I had the chance."

"You were a little kid and you were sick," he reasoned. She looked up at him with her eyes big and glistening, "And c'mon, you're only 15, you shouldn't regret anything yet."

"The way you treat me like a child is completely uncalled for. I have proven that I am far more educated that any little kid. I hate how adults are always acting like teenagers don't have any worldly sense and experience. We know more than we let on, that's all."

"I know you do, but your blinding optimism kind of gets in the way of that," he breathed out, mostly to himself then to the girl across from him. But she definitely heard and sat up even more at his words.

"I'm sorry that the trials and tribulations of adult life haven't reached my generation yet," she said, sarcastically, "Besides, I'd rather be blissfully optimistic then someone who dwells on everything bad that has happened to them. It's depressing and makes life unbearable."

"Shit happens to people and it brings them down. All those smiley happy people just make it worse by flashing their happiness in your face."

"Oh, so like me," she said, not offended, but challenging. Alex shifted in his chair, ready to defend what he had said.

"You don't count because-"

"Because I'm just a kid, right? It's not like I've spent two years of my life fending off cancer that could have been fatal. All I'm saying is that I know more about life then you think I do. I'm educated and I've had enough shitty stuff happen to me to know what it's like."

"Fine, you win," he gave in, unable to think of a rebuttal to what she had said. She smiled triumphantly, pleased that she had beaten what seemed like the king of depressing at his own game.

"Thank you," she nodded, grinning from ear to ear.

He gave a small snort, "You are your mother."

"If I may say so," she began, "For someone who doesn't like to talk about Izzie, you sure bring her up a lot."

"I don't normally, it's just that seeing you has brought back all those feelings and thoughts of her. You are so much like her it scares me."

"I hope that's a good thing," she said, eyeing him carefully.

He gave into her, nodding, "It's a great thing."

*

Alex, despite himself, agreed to meet her again after they talked longer. They didn't bring up Izzie for the rest of the conversation. It was mostly her critiquing his methods of CPR, which he listened to, and then disagreed, proving his correct. This seemed to be how their conversations went; one of them would say something, and the other would bite back with a witty rebuttal. As much as he tried to deny it, Alex liked the sort of air around them that caused. The way Hannah would listen to his every word, but then battle it with so much intent and thought made him want to talk even more. So when she asked if they could meet again, he couldn't say no to her, like he hadn't the first time.

The next Wednesday, Alex sat in the cafeteria during lunch, reading over a book about CPR and the new methods. He was still a little baffled about how she thought he was doing it wrong. He knew he had almost never done this for anyone, but Hannah was different.

He looked up when someone set his or her tray down across from him. He looked up to see April standing there, looking at him as if to ask if she could sit down. He gestured for her to do so, which she obliged quickly.

"Alex," she started out, before stabbing her fork into the salad she had. She took a bite, as if waiting for him to respond.

"What?" he asked, dog-earring the page he was on in the book. She dabbed at her mouth and continued speaking.

"I heard what you're doing for that girl, Izzie's daughter, in the locker room last week. I think it's pretty cool and noble of you."

"How is that?" he asked. He had never thought of it that way. Really, he hadn't put much extreme deep thought into it until recently.

"Well, you're the closest connection she has to her real mom, so by mentoring her you're giving her what Izzie can't. I think it's something good and you should feel good about it."

He nodded, "I guess so."

April smiled at him before taking another bite of her salad. Alex quickly returned to his reading.

*

Hannah and Alex continued meeting for weeks past that Wednesday. They talked so much about medical advances, like her trying to explain her theory about the Shepard method yet again. Alex listened carefully, her words actually making sense. After a couple weeks, she brought up Izzie again, and they were able to have a deep and long conversation about her. Hannah seemed so fascinated by her mother that Alex couldn't deprive her of that talk. Overall, the relationship they developed felt really solid. It actually gave Alex a paternal sense in a way he never thought possible.

However, that all changed one day when Alex was in the middle of work. It had been two months since he and Hannah's first meeting and he was looking forward to talking to her later that day. He had just finished his rounds when Doctor Bailey approached him.

"Karev," she said, her voice not as commanding as usual. He waited for the order she was about to give him, but she simply leaned slightly forward so no one could hear, "There is a family asking for you. Klein, I believe it is."

He nodded, knowing he had heard that name before, but he still couldn't place it. "Okay, where?"

"They're up in the oncology wing. They said it's pretty urgent," she said and he nodded yet again, heading towards the said place. He felt pretty good that a family was requesting his services. That had never happened to him before, but he thought that everyone had his or her time.

When he reached the oncology wing, two frantic looking people, a man and a woman met him. They approached him, trying not to look so panicked, but failing.

"Are you Doctor Karev?" the man said, his voice sad and stressed.

"I am," Alex said, knitting his eyebrows, looking at the two. He didn't recognize them from anywhere and they clearly didn't know him, so why were they asking for him.

The woman spoke up, "Oh thank God! Our daughter, Hannah, she's been asking for you all morning."

That's when it hit him. He remembered seeing Klein on Hannah's notebook one day. But he felt his heart drop when he thought of where he was at. But he had to keep his composure, as hard as that was.

"Hannah, do you know where she is?" he asked, concern leaking out of his voice.

Her dad pointed to the room down the hall, "She's in there. Oh, and we know who you are, She talks about you all the time, how she's learning so much from you," he said, his voice full of gratitude, "Thank you, she deserves to know about her mom."

Alex nodded and walked down the hall to the room he had pointed to. There was Hannah, lying on the bed, deep purple circles around her eyes. She smiled faintly when he entered the room, sitting up and setting the issue of WebMD she was reading down.

"You guys have got to get better magazines for this place," she commented, moving around the wires that were hooked around her. Alex stepped closer to her bed and until he was standing beside her. She moved her legs over, allowing him to sit slightly.

"It's back, isn't it?" he knew it. But she was so healthy and was doing so good. How could the cancer come back so suddenly?

"Yeah," she nodded, her voice weak. She ran her fingers through her hair, pulling out a long clump of it, "They've already put me back on chemo, but they don't think it's doing much. They want me to have another marrow transplant, but I said no."

He couldn't believe what he was hearing. "Why would you say no? Hannah, it could save your life!"

"Yes, but for how long?" she asked, sadly, "I'll just be back in here again in a couple years. Besides, my body's rejecting all other treatment. It's time to face facts, I'm gonna die this time."

"Wow," he said standing up; "I never took you as one to give up."

"Alex, you don't understand," she said, her voice faltering, "I'm not giving up. I'm too tired to do this anymore. You don't have to accept it, but please, respect it."

He looked down at his feet, nodding sadly, "I know. But I don't want to think about it. I mean, you were one of the only people who enjoyed talking to me and took what I had to say into consideration."

"I know. But right now, I just need you to be there for me. To help me through this because you're the only person I really trust here. Please, Alex, for me."

"Okay," he nodded. She smiled up at him faintly.

*

It wasn't for another two days until he went to Hannah's room. He was still processing what was going on. She was in the hospital with cancer again, rejecting an opportunity to have a life saving marrow transplant. What about all she wanted to achieve later? She always talked about how she was going to be a doctor some day. Why was she giving up that chance?

Alex approached the young girl's room and was greeted by the sounds of her parents and her having a dispute. He could hear her mother crying about how she was having the transplant and how Hannah was firm on not. They asked her all the questions he'd been asking himself, but to everyone, Hannah was silent. Alex finally couldn't take it anymore, and knocked on the door quietly.

Her parents looked up and her mother quickly wiped her tear stained cheeks, "Oh, Doctor Karev. Please come in. We were just going to go get something to eat. Do you think you could look after Hannah?"

He nodded and they hurried out. "I'm not five mom! I don't need to be babysat!" Hannah yelled before slumping tiredly back against her bed. She rubbed her hand across her newly bald head, sighing heavily.

"Hey," Alex said walking into the room and pulling the large green chair up beside her bed. He sat and looked at Hannah, who was taking in deep breaths through her nose, with the help of the oxygen tank that was hooked up through there.

"I hate them sometimes. Why won't they just let me die?" she said bitterly. She took in another breath after speaking. It seemed like it was getting harder for her to talk.

"Maybe because they're you're parents and they want to fight for you," he suggested, fixing her pillow, "And also, you sound like one of my 80 year old patients with all this 'I want to die' crap."

She turned her head and he got the full effect of her. She looked so sick and exhausted. He couldn't believe it was only a week ago when she appeared perfectly healthy and was bantering with him like usual. Oh, how he wished to have that back.

"It's not that I want to die," she said and took in a large breath, "It's an inevitability," another breath, "I don't want to get their hopes up with all these false pretences," breath, "I'm going to be dead soon, that's all it is to it."

"Okay, yeah, you're dying, but do you really want to? Don't you want to put in some effort so you can be a doctor and do all these great things you talk about?"

"Like you said, there comes a point when you can't be ignorant anymore and have to accept the truth. Being optimistic about everything is annoying and falsely derived."

He sighed, "You don't get it, Hannah. That's the best part about you. The way you are always hopeful about everything. How you never take no for an answer. I know I'm supposed to respect your decision and I can't do anything about it because I'm not the doctor on your case, but I really think you should try and fight this, just a little bit longer."

"Please Alex," she pleaded, her voice weaker than ever, "I know you don't agree with it. But you're the only person I can talk to who was never all mushy and emotional. I want that Alex now. The one who doesn't give a shit about anyone but himself. Please."

"But I do. I give a shit about you, Hannah," he knew he should just stop and give in, "This may sound really bad, but you're the closest thing I have to Izzie. And I kinda liked spending time with you. It made it feel like I was doing something good and I was helping you."

"You did help me. And now I need you to stay with me and help me through this," she breathed in again longer than before, "I need you to be here for me, when I die."

Alex didn't say anything after that. He knew, like always, fighting with her was futile.

*

It wasn't long before the day that Hannah was going to die came creeping up. The doctors kept saying it wasn't going to be long and Alex could tell that was true. He came a visited her everyday, just talking to her when it became too much for her to speak.

It was a Wednesday, exactly four months after their first meeting, when he came up there and her parents were there at her bedside. He looked at Hannah and saw her eyes drooping, completely outlined with purple. He stepped into the room and all eyes were on him.

"I'm sorry," he said quietly, "I can go."

"No," Hannah croaked out, "Stay here."

Her parents didn't argue and he did just that. He stayed by her side like them and watched as she breathed in shallowly and blinked slower and slower.

"It's okay, honey," her mom said tearfully, "You can go. It's okay."

The only sound in the room was the sniffing back of tears and the slow beep of machines. Alex look up at the screen that kept her heart beat and watched as it decreased ever so slowly. The beeps were more spread out and suddenly started up again.

"Alex," he heard her rasp out. He looked up at her expectantly and she took in a deep breath, "Please, just think about my idea," a breath, "Work on it…for me."

"I promise," he said quietly and he saw a smile grace her lips. He returned his eyes back to the monitor and watched as the rate decreased yet again. The beeping got quicker and louder, as well as the tears and wails from her parents. But soon enough, there was the straight, flat line. They waited a long time, while the solid beep resounded through the room.

The doctors came in and announced her death, unhooking her from all the wires. They said their condolences to her parents and everything went on as usual. Alex was so used to this, but it was different watching Hannah be taken away. He watched as they removed her lifeless body from the room and set up all the arrangements. He could hear her parents calling all their relatives and telling them the news, but Alex was numb.

He walked down from the oncology wing and to the locker room. He sat in there, his mind trying to wrap around what had happened. Hannah was dead. He would never see or talk to her again. That was all it was.

*

People started to filter into the locker room, but he didn't move or even flinch. It wasn't until he felt someone sit beside him when he noticed the room was empty again, except for him and his companion. He looked over and saw April there. She put her hand on his shoulder.

"I heard about Hannah," she whispered. He nodded and looked at the ground, holding back the tears that were pooling in his eyes. He didn't cry, especially not in front of her, someone he barely knew.

She knew he didn't like physical contact and even more than that, the feeling of being weak. But still, April couldn't help herself from wrapping her arms around him. And he allowed her to. They stayed like that for a long time until Alex finally spoke up.

"I promised her…Hannah…that I would look into something," he said sadly, "That I'd see if the Shepard method worked on other tumors."

The redheaded girl nodded, "Okay. We can…do that. I can help you. "

"Okay," he said, a bit of hope rising in his chest. Sure, it might not work, but he was trying. He had to, for Hannah. He to try as hard as he possibly could to see if it would work.

April gave him a weak smile and unwrapped herself from him, "Okay," she said again and stood up, "I'll see you around," she said, knowing there was nothing more she could do. He nodded and listened as the door closed.

That was it. He was going to do this. He was going to figure out this until it made since. If his life depended on it. The Hannah Method.

It was going to happen.


End file.
